Kaylyn's Story

Logo design courtesy of K.Lynn Photography

I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was 20 weeks pregnant and very excited to be going to find out if my 3rd child was going to be a girl or a boy. This was my worst pregnancy and I kept saying to my husband, "Something is wrong,I know it." He assured me it was just my nerves. It was Thurs., Oct. 18, 2007. As I layed on the ultrasound table the tech asked if we wanted to know what it was, "yes please" was my reply. "It's a Girl and she is very active". I was thrilled! Then the tech got real quite and I knew something wasn't right. She said she couldn't get a good view of her heart so she would have the Dr. look. After about 20 mins. of the Dr. looking in silence, she told my husband and I that our little girl had a heart defect and it was pretty severe. She recommended we go to the Children's hospital 2 hrs. from home for a second opinion. She also told us that if we wished to terminate our time was running short. I thought to myself, terminate, I just found out she was a very active little girl.
   On Monday we went to the Children's Hospital. They confirmed her heart defect. She had DORV ( Double-Outlet Right Ventricle with Pulminary Hypertension). They assured us that the pregnancy could continue and that our little girl would need multiple surgeries to repair her heart. They recommended that I have a amniocentesis to determine if it was connected to a genetic disorder although it wasn't a common heart defect for genetic disorders. They said it was just better for them to know if the baby had any other conditions since we already told them terminating was not an option.
   On Wed. I went for my amnio. They said the results would take a week or so to come back. I went on with my life thinking, the test would be normal and we would get passed the heart issue and everything would be okay. That Fri., 2 days later I got the call. The lady on the phone said "Hi Mrs. Boronski, I have your amnio results and I'm sorry to tell you your daughter has Down Syndrome and I'd like you to come in as soon as possible because your time to terminate is almost up". I told her we were not terminating, my husband and I already decided that. She sais we should still come in. That was it, my perfect world just ended with two words " DOWN SYNDROME". I was alone with my other children so I held it together and called mom, when she got to the house I told her and locked myself in the bathroom and had my first of many breakdowns. Then I called my hubby at work to come home.
   We went to the appointment and they told us all the things my daughter could have wrong with her. They pushed and pushed terminating, but we were not doing that. My baby was a girl, she was active, she had a name, how could we take her life away. I went home and studied everything on DS. That's when I saw all the good things about Ds also. I thought, boy, they didn't say any of this. Thank god for mothers who speak out on the good things, telling me that my daughter will walk, talk ,read ,go to school etc..., it helped.
   Athough I knew terminating was not an option I went through a horrible time. The why me, why my family, how can I do this, it's my fault. The rest of my pregnancy was not enjoyed and filled with depression. I remember praying to god to have a miscarriage, that if he was taking her home and not me taking her life away, I could live with that. I pretty much hated everyone, especially the two family members that were pregnant with me and having healthy babies to throw in my face.
   On Feb. 26 2008 at 1:20 am Kaylyn Hope was born. We were told that she would be rushed to the cardiac floor, because she would be born blue and probably not breathing on her own due to her heart defect. Not my baby, she came out screaming and breathing, beautiful color and scored a 9 on her apgar. I remember my husband telling me how "perfect" she was. Once I layed my eyes on her I was so in love, I was able to accept my daughter, I did love her. I had a fears that I wouldn't. That night I cried myself to sleep and thanked God for the unanswered prayers.
   Kaylyn came home 3 weeks later. She had her first surgery at 3 months and her second at 9 months. She really is not much different then my other children. A few more Dr. appointments and some therapy but she is thriving and growing. My other children love her to pieces. When I look back now I could kick myself for all the thoughts and fears, but I know they are very normal. Kaylyn introduced us to a whole new world and my family is stronger and closer then ever. Not to mention the new DS family that I found by joining Ds groups.
    My daughter is extra special! She will do all the things that I do and she will do it at her own pace. I love that every milestone she reaches is such an achievment and it fills me with so much pride. I realized now that I was truely blessed and instead of the why me's I thank god for choosing me to be a parent to my beautiful angel.
   My hopes for my daughter is that we can give her that typical life. I will treat her no differently then my other children and I hope others can do the same. I hope to be the mother who can help other mothers going throught the same thing to understand that it will be okay. I want to get the word out to Drs., that it is importrant to inform parents of the things their child can do instead of just the negative. Down syndrome is NOT the end of the world, it's a beautiful beginning. It's one little extra chromosome but it gives so much to my life. I couldn't live without my daughter and I wouldn't change one thing about her.